So, one of the things Cute Guy and I like to do, is to go to the off-leash park and play with the dogs... We both love dogs, but don't have dogs. It's just fun to go and play with someone else's pet for a while then walk away at the end of an hour, without having to clean up any shit.
Visiting his house has been sort of the same for me... I love teenagers as long as they were spawned by SOMEONE ELSE. Well, at least as long as I don't have to ride public transit with a herd of them.... That's just cruel and inhuman in my books.
But if they're in their own natural habitat they have teriffic senses of humor, are astute and intelligent a lot of the time, have great energy and watching them use their super human bargaining skills for that $20, $1000 bike, $150 pair of shoes or new car they "need" with someone else rather than me is incredibly funny....
A couple of nights ago, I was invited to Cute Guy's house for dinner with his teens and various and sundry other teens who had dropped by to eat because he's a good cook... I KNOW... that's the second dinner in a week he's cooked for me... He's smart, handsome AND he can cook....
I'm hearing that collective AAAAAAAW! from the women reading this.... Don't become hostile toward your mate, because I haven't had to lift a freaking finger yet....you chose HIM.... But again, I digress.... Hanging around his house is like being at mine but with different neighbors...
Oh. Wait. There IS one noteable exception.... his daughter's friend was sitting at the kitchen table with a TEXTBOOK... It looked vaguely familiar to me and I had to think WAY back to when I was in school....That's such a foreign concept in my house, I actually had to ask what she was doing. She said she was STUDYING. I said to her "Wow! I've HEARD that happens, I've just never seen it done..." All I can say, is thank GOD my boys are pretty...
So back to the story...Cute Guy and I were comparing our "Affectionate words of the day"... He had been told he was "incrediby annoying" and "so GAY" earlier in the day ... can't remember what horrifying parental act he'd done to deserve that, but I won the prize because I was "Such a douche" coupled with that so dramatic it's AUDIBLE eye roll, which gave me bonus points for the win, because I insisted my kid put his dishes INSIDE rather than on top of the dishwasher...
People who don't have teens probably don't realize how often the word DOUCHE is used in today's vernacular. Cute Guy's suggestion is that I have my son expand his use of the word as a verb and adjective next, because he might as well figure out how to leverage it into all sorts of new terms....
I found out the sad truth that Dishleprophoia - or the fear of dishwashers (YES it's a real word!) has reached epidemic proportions...there seems to be an outbreak of it at his house too.... so I gathered up the salad bowls after dinner and put them in the sink because the dishwasher was full of clean dishes and I didn't know where to put them away.
Anyhow, WTF is it with kids and not understanding how things work? These guys can set up a computer, navigate illegal music download sites so fast your head will spin, and can hack into NASA, but they can't load and unload a freaking dishwasher. The concept is pretty simple right? Open the door, put the dishes inside, put soap in, push a button, and like magic, you have a clean fork to use after a while.... Even when you convince them to LOAD the dishwasher, the whole UNLOADING part escapes them....
I really enjoyed my evening at the offleash Teen Park that is Cute Guy's house... I find it so comforting to see that my house isn't much different than his...The best part about going over there is I don't have to deal with the shit... that is, until I go home to a house full of hungry teens and a sink full of dishes.
Later...
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